Wednesday, March 7, 2018

When Your Week Includes Moving and Learning Hebrew

It's been a hot minute since the last time I posted. I haven't had much time to write anything, as we have been moving. Yes, moving. I hadn't done this in nearly eight years, so I had forgotten why everyone groans out of pity when you announce your plans.
I done been reminded, and let me tell you
The house was built in the eighties, so we did some reno (I abbreviate my home improvement terms because I'm so fancy...that's a total lie BTW). The list  included replacing carpet, refinishing wood floors, having the popcorn ceilings scraped, tearing off a TON of wallpaper, going through many magic erasers scrubbing marks off walls, and dusting. So. Much. Dusting. In the future we will probably replace some things in the kitchen, paint certain areas, and so on (I honestly just don't want to think about that right now 😜). We were finally able to move in on February 26th. But, the week we moved included more than just, you know, MOVING. I also had choir every night except Wednesday. We had been invited to sing with the Memphis Symphony Orchestra for Leonard Bernstein's 100th birthday. Jamie Bernstein (his oldest daughter) was the narrator! Our performances were this past Saturday and Sunday. I absolutely loved it, and I really hope to do it again someday! However, the piece we had to perform was not easy. It was called "Kaddish," and it was roughly 42 minutes long. Now, we weren't singing for the whole 114 pages that was this piece, but we did have to sing a five part round, a high F#/Gb for, like, a long time (I can't remember how many beats or measures at the moment), and a high G for another long time (still can't remember 😜). This all seems okay until you realize that it's in Hebrew and you're not able to use your music for some of it.

Yeah, it was just hard at first. I will say, though, that after a few rehearsals, we basically got the gist of the piece. Anyways, we've now been in the house for 9 days, so we're just starting to relax, and I love choir (Shocker!). I think that's about it (=. Thanks for reading!

Sunday, January 14, 2018

Then Sings My Soul....

Wednesday, January 10th

So I walked into church, ready to lead worship as I do every Wednesday. Playing guitar and deciding how many times to play the final chorus is how this normally goes. However, today was different. One of the two vocalists wasn't going to be able to make it, and we wanted somebody else to sing. Now self-confidence is not my thing. So when everybody else on worship team had refused to sing and it came down to me, I handled it rather well, except, oh yeah, HAVING A SMALL PANIC ATTACK!! I love singing in solitude, and I've become a lot better with my confidence. In fact, I allowed my mother to post a video of me singing to her Facebook (after a week and a half of trying to decide if it was a good idea, and when she posted it it was a huge breakthrough in my book). But, singing in front of my piers makes me feel very vulnerable and self-conscious. I will admit though, part of the reason why I didn't refuse, was because deep down inside I was kind of  excited. Practice was fine, but during dinner, I suddenly started feeling nervous again. I was glad to have the opportunity to lead worship like this, but I couldn't knock down the fact that I might mess up. Then the Lord showed me the truth of the situation. As if someone were standing in front of me saying it I heard: It's not about you. Then the scales were lifted from my eyes (so to speak 😀), and I realized it wasn't about me. My focus had been on how I would mess up. How I could have my voice crack. Me me me me ME! Leading worship is NOT performing! Praise the Lord that He showed me that, because I was walking down a dangerous path. At this point, it was time for worship. I can tell you, this was one of those times where I realized: this is why we do what we do. For a brief moment, I forgot that there was anyone else in the room, and it just became me singing to God. That is worship. I love music, and to be able to come together with other believers and use music for God's glory makes me realize how blessed we are. To be a worship leader is such a privilege and honor, and I know I did nothing to deserve it. I'm very grateful to be able to worship and be loved by God. Thanks for reading!

Friday, January 5, 2018


So.........if you haven't already noticed, I've failed at the schedule thing. I honestly don't know how consistent my posting is going to be but 😜
Happy Friday!!